A Jewish father, Moisha, was paid a
visit
by his eldest son Yitzak...
"Father, I am going to marry!"
.
His father begins to dance with joy and
sing Hava Nagila...
"Tell me, is she a good Jewish girl?"
says the father. "What is her name?"
.
"O'Brien," replies the son... "She's
Catholic..."
.
"Oy!" says the father.... "But are you
happy?"
.
"I'm very, very happy," says the son..
.
"OK...as long as you're happy ... my
blessings
to you both," replies Moisha.
.
But the father is still counting on his
remaining sons, Schlemiel and Chutzpah.
.
Schlemiel calls on his father the next
evening. "Father... I too will be married soon!"
.
Again, Moisha breaks out in a dance and
sings God's praises...
"What is her name?," implores the father.
.
"Kazalopodopolous," says the son. "She's
Greek Orthodox."
.
"Oy," says Moisha. "But are you happy?"
.
"I'm happy, Father."
.
"OK ... then you, too, have my blessing,"
intones Moisha.
.
Dejected, Moisha goes to the Temple to
pray.
"Please God... let my remaining son,
Chutzpah,
marry a nice Jewish girl
to raise nice Jewish children in your
eyes ... PLEASE," he cries out.
.
The next week, Chutzpah comes to his
father
excitedly and exclaims,
"Father!!, I am to wed in the spring!"
.
"HER NAME? WHAT IS HER NAME?", his father
immediately demands.
.
"Goldberg!", says Chutzpah!
.
Moisha is beside himself with joy!
"Praise God! Praise the Prophets!"
Turning
to Chutzpah, he asks, "Is she
Doctor Goldberg's daughter Shelley, from
Los Angeles?"
.
"No," says Chutzpah.
.
"Hmmm," says Moisha... "Must be attorney
Goldberg's daughter Rachel from Beverly
Hills?"
.
"Ah... no, Father," says Chutzpah...
.
"What is her first name, my youngest,
truest, most beautiful son?"
?
?
?
?
?
"Whoopi."